Social anxiety in Nigeria.

0:00Um GMGM um my name is John B and um this for We Them Media and for this week episode we’ll be asking different people um about their take on social anxiety and right here with me I have Mr. um Ado

0:16uh Mr. If you are being asked um what does social anxiety means? Like what comes to mind? Yeah, social anxiety. It means like something like stage fright. Yeah. Something like stage frights. Occurrence of stage fright. You know when they call you out on the stage to come and like say something to thousands of people understand? Thousands of people. Then you’ll be like you can be afraid. Understand? You’ll be afraid and um stuff like that. So you be like when they call you out on the stage to come and say something in front of thousands of people what’s what’s going to happen is that it’s either you are looking down

0:55or you’re looking side you are sweating or you’re stammering either one of those things I said so well you can just um social anxieties it means like there are plenty definition of social anxiety you understand so but in my own thoughts my own thoughts I believe social anxiety is like when you’re about to do something you’ve never done before and you’re feeling scared about it and you miss like you lose like your feeling you lose your cool you some some people might even break down oneself

1:27okay yeah um thank you for that um okay my next question regarding that is u you’re a student right as a student have you ever felt social anxiety about maybe an upcoming exam test or

1:42eventually I won’t lie. I guess every student feels it social anxiety every time. But I’m not sure for others. I’m not sure for other student. But I feel like to me some most of my friends, most of my Yeah. friends and maybe relative, family members, they all feel it too. But I don’t know about every other person cuz I’ve never met every other single person in this world. So well to me, yes. Mhm. when most people feel it

2:14at that moment. Um, this is more like a personal question. Like how does it feel like maybe just one of those moments? Like how do you feel? And

2:25the last the last time I felt social anxiety, you know, like I feel like I was going to die. I feel like I couldn’t die.

2:33So I feel like everything I was sweating. I like I couldn’t answer a question correctly. Like I started stammering like like I was like I I I

2:48you know what you Yeah, I know what I wanted to see like it was in my mind but to me speaking it out you know thousands of people I was on the stage that time in school I was on the stage thousands of people on watching me all eyes on me you understand all eyes on me so everything just I I don’t know how like everything just went black like I don’t want

3:12right to me I feel like it’s not a nice experience Yeah. So, um how do you now how do you plan on preventing something like that?

3:23Well, preventing something like I’ve um talked to myself about it that maybe next time when maybe next time when I’m on a stage or when they call me out on the stage, I have to like prepare before I even come out on the stage. I don’t know if you get me. So like um preparing like what I mean is by maybe um practicing in front of a mirror, practicing in front of your family members what you’re about to see when you get there, what you are going to see when you get there. Understand? Then especially that practicing in front of a mirror so you know that yeah you know

4:01that yeah maybe what you are doing you know how you’re moving what you’re saying you will be seeing it in front of the mirror like in the mirror. So you know whether you are doing it correctly or you are doing it right. No one is supposed to tell you no by yourself because you’re looking at yourself. Then practicing in front of your family members. Obviously there are family members. But they can anything you do wrong they can correct you without being so harsh like harsh. Understand? So just like mirror your friends that you trust your trustworthy friends your mirror family and trustworthy friends

4:40that’s that’s actually interesting and another thing uh you know social anxiety can come in different forms uh so um as a student do you also feel anxiety about life after school or you just live your daytoday life from

4:55I used I used to I used to do that when I was in secondary like I was like oh my god what will happen when I’m done with secondary school life after school you know I’m going to write exams to enter uni

5:08then after uni I’m going to serve if I want to do my masters and everything so what’s what will come after school like when I’m done with my whole process of school that’s life after school so I felt like that before like felt like that

5:26now you don’t well now to say I’m feeling it like right now. It’s just like you know like I give a I give like how would I put it now but but at the same time I don’t really give you conscious trying to plan your life. I’m trying to not on the point of being scared what will happen will definitely happen. There’s no changing it. No changing. You can’t you can’t you can’t rewrite your future. Understand? You can’t rewrite it, bro. No, you can walk towards it, but you can’t rewrite it. You know what is going to happen in the future is obviously going to happen.

6:07Like we don’t know. So what is going to happen is going to happen. So there’s nothing you can do about it. That’s just what I feel. So I’ll be like whatever happens will happen. There’s nothing I can do about it. What advice will you give to someone maybe that’s watching this and feel anxious about maybe they want to take a next big step um in their life but they’re always anxious about it. What advice you think you can give them that can be of

6:36advice? I’ll just be like just it’s better not to worry about what will happen in the future. You feel me? It’s better not to worry about what will happen in the future. Instead, worry about what will happen what what will happen the next in the next step you take.

6:53Okay? Understand? Like what you’re going to do later on, not later in the future. H you don’t get. Okay. What what that means is that when you if you worry about what you’re going to do like me now like as I am now I’m worrying it’s not like I’m worrying about what will happen in the future. I’m worrying about what will happen after this.

7:15Okay. After this like what am I going to what am I going to eat? What is it I’m going to do? Am I going back to the hotel? Am I going to meet a friend?

7:23Um to get you right you mean um you try to like worry more like maybe two step step not like 100 step like that. So just forget about

7:38you might have like bad days, you might have like days that are not really good but just because a chapter in your life feels bad bad doesn’t mean your whole entire life will crumble down. So just forget about it and just move on five steps ahead. That’s it. That’s what I really like.

8:02That’s what I think. Thank you very much for that. I really do appreciate your like you giving us your time to talk and stuff. So let’s assume that I’m to approach another random person. Now which question do you think it makes sense for me to ask them?

8:18That one that one depends on you. No, no, no, no. You there are sometimes that you just have a question in your mind. I just like I would like to ask people just to hear their perspective.

8:29You can just ask them how are they coping with their anxiety if they have one like if they feel one how do they cope with it so that everybody else can learn from themsel how do you cope on it? what steps you need to take in order to like forget about it as if what you see is relating to that.

8:53So I think that’s my biggest option for now. Thank you very much for your response. I really appreciate that. So that’s all. Thank you very much. You have a nice day.